{"id":1856,"date":"2008-08-08T08:08:00","date_gmt":"2008-08-08T12:08:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.calgarygrit.ca\/?p=1856"},"modified":"2008-08-08T08:08:00","modified_gmt":"2008-08-08T12:08:00","slug":"faster-stronger-higher","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.calgarygrit.ca\/?p=1856","title":{"rendered":"Faster, Stronger, Higher"},"content":{"rendered":"

The Olympics kick off today, a time when Canadians join together and show national pride in their new found appreciation of synchronized trampolining. But the lesser known “political olympics<\/span>” also kick off this week – here’s a run-down of some of the key events:<\/p>\n

Gymnastics<\/strong>: The Tories were the early favourites in this event, but have decided to boycott all judged sports, claiming a judging conspiracy against them.<\/p>\n

The Marathon<\/strong>: The marathon commemorates the run of the soldier Pheidippides from a battlefield at the site of the town of Marathon, Greece, to Athens in 490 B.C. Fun fact – Phheidippides served in the same military unit as John McCain.<\/p>\n

Softball<\/strong>: The media lob questions at Barack Obama.<\/p>\n

Synchronized Messaging<\/strong>: The Liberal Party tries to keep all their MPs<\/span> on message. [note: this is actually a “special political olympics” event]<\/em><\/p>\n

Pole Vault<\/strong>: How high can the federal government’s polling budget go? Michael Fortier<\/span> comes in as the favourite, however this event is set to air at 3 a.m. so it may be difficult for viewers to catch it.<\/p>\n

High Dive<\/strong>: Watch over hyped politicians do a belly flop! This field should be wide open after the defending champion, Andre Boisclair<\/span>, was disqualified for a failed<\/span> drug test.<\/p>\n

Shooting Events<\/strong>: [A Liberal riding president submitted<\/span> a hilarious joke to me for this one, but it has been removed on advice from my lawyer]<\/em><\/p>\n

Hurdles<\/strong>: Traditionally designed in such a way where the opposition party would put up hurdles for the Prime Minister to leap over…this year, the event will involve the official opposition threatening<\/em> to put hurdles on the track.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

The Olympics kick off today, a time when Canadians join together and show national pride in their new found appreciation of synchronized trampolining. But the lesser known “political olympics” also kick off this week – here’s a run-down of some of the key events: Gymnastics: The Tories were the early favourites in this event, but […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1856","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.calgarygrit.ca\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1856","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.calgarygrit.ca\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.calgarygrit.ca\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.calgarygrit.ca\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.calgarygrit.ca\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1856"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.calgarygrit.ca\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1856\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.calgarygrit.ca\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1856"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.calgarygrit.ca\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1856"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.calgarygrit.ca\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1856"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}